I have had the joy and opportunity to both be a mentor and be mentored myself. Being mentored has had a great impact on my life and has affected some of the decisions that I have made. I personally have been mentored by Aline Simpson (an amazing lady!) who has been there through the tough and good times of my life. Being mentored is not pressured and there’s no forced way to do it - just a wonderful friendship and someone to talk who may have experienced similar obstacles in life. I have had quite a few challenges in my life and Aline has not only built my confidence but challenged me to view something in a different way that I perhaps had not seen in the beginning.
Through the positive experience that I have had being mentored I continue to mentor some young people myself and try to be a benefit to them in the same way as I have had. I have really seen firsthand the influence that having a positive role model in mentoring can be. It has helped me on both my journey with God, with day to day life and has inspired me to be a mentor and do the same for other young people; to give them that same opportunity. My experience in being a mentor instead of mentee has been a great privilege because it has allowed me to have an insight into the life of that young person; the young person has also been honest about situations in their life that they don’t feel they can talk to anyone about.
Generally, we meet in a relaxed environment like a coffee shop or café to have a snack/drink. This makes the situation comfortable and allows the young person to say as little or as much as they want to. I have had experiences where I have just listened and others where I have felt it was right to give input. A challenging part of mentoring is gaining the young person’s trust; where they feel they can let their guard down and be more vulnerable about their true feelings.
Mentoring is not to stay stuck in the past but to guide and help the young person move forward in a positive way in their life. God has shown me through the mentoring experience that I can use my own difficult times to help young people and because of this I believe that every experience - whether good or bad - shapes and moulds us into the people we become and closer to the people God wants us to be. The choice is whether to become bitter about the difficult situations or to see God in the centre continually watching over us.
Although it’s not easy, I have seen that God uses all experiences to either help other people or strengthen our character, for this reason I know that I have used my experiences to advise and mentor young people and develop a positive relationship that is continuous.
Mentoring aims to develop the whole person and to walk alongside them in relationship as they walk forward in their life and relationship with God. I know that my mentoring journey has been invaluable to my life and I hope to use all the experiences and lessons that I have learnt along the way to be part of a support network for more young people in the future.
Ruth Chamley
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